The size of my girlfriends stomach (she hates it when i call it a 'stomach'!) has grown scary big. Its like she's carrying two baby elephants and a squirrel inside there. i am not sure which month she is in right now, i am terrible at math and my school teacher was a chang'aa addict. She is so big i'm thinking one day she might go to the loo and then come out yelling, "Honey i think i pooped the baby and flushed it down the toilet! D'yu mind calling the Plumber?? The umbilical cord is stuck!!"
For the past week she has been bugging me about how much she wants to know the gender of the baby. She wants a boy, i want a girl. The only thing that has stopped her from going and checking the baby's gender is her fear of being alone with a doctor. Not all doctors apparently but its just those doctors who know the female body more than the females themselves. Those doctors who will try to venture below some females' waist in the name of 'medical check-up' even when she has an ear infection. This gender debate has generated a lot of heat in the house. I insist i do not want to know the gender, i would rather we do it traditional, u know, wait for the big day and see. After all, we've already done the scan to confirm the the baby doesn't have two buttocks and three left feet. She thinks that if she buys baby girl clothes and then she gets a boy, then the boy might grow to be gay. The other day she came home with two shopping bags full of baby boy clothes, i asked why she thought it was a boy and she said she "felt" it was a boy because it kicked worse than Niklas Bentner missing Arsenal goals.
Trying to argue with a pregnant woman is worse than studying Chinese or Russian. You argue, she cries, If you don't, she still cries and insists that you don't love her anymore. If you play nice and you are always smiling, she will accuse u of cheating on her because shes fat and when she lies down on her back, her tummy looks like Mt. Kenya's 'Batian' peak. If you think women are difficult try pregnant ones!!
For the past week she has been bugging me about how much she wants to know the gender of the baby. She wants a boy, i want a girl. The only thing that has stopped her from going and checking the baby's gender is her fear of being alone with a doctor. Not all doctors apparently but its just those doctors who know the female body more than the females themselves. Those doctors who will try to venture below some females' waist in the name of 'medical check-up' even when she has an ear infection. This gender debate has generated a lot of heat in the house. I insist i do not want to know the gender, i would rather we do it traditional, u know, wait for the big day and see. After all, we've already done the scan to confirm the the baby doesn't have two buttocks and three left feet. She thinks that if she buys baby girl clothes and then she gets a boy, then the boy might grow to be gay. The other day she came home with two shopping bags full of baby boy clothes, i asked why she thought it was a boy and she said she "felt" it was a boy because it kicked worse than Niklas Bentner missing Arsenal goals.
Trying to argue with a pregnant woman is worse than studying Chinese or Russian. You argue, she cries, If you don't, she still cries and insists that you don't love her anymore. If you play nice and you are always smiling, she will accuse u of cheating on her because shes fat and when she lies down on her back, her tummy looks like Mt. Kenya's 'Batian' peak. If you think women are difficult try pregnant ones!!
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