Today is my day off, am home with my girlfriend and so far the day has been without drama. I had woken up at 12 noon and was now enjoying a rerun of 24 season 7. My girlfriend doesn't like violent movies but on this day she is just sited right there with me. She has already planned on how she will destroy and burn all my "action-packed" DVDs. I don't argue much with that because i know if men worldwide have successfully manged to hide their "x-rated" movies then this will be a walk in the park for me. Keenly watching Jack Bauer kicking butt on TV suddenly this really sharp pain pieces my groin.
My girlfriend had thrown her arm across and almost hit a place where all men would die protecting. Her hand was tightly squeezing as her fingernails dug inside my thighs and i almost screamed but when i looked at my girlfriend, the expression on her face was that of a person with serious constipation issues. Then amidst all this pain, she peed. Can you believe that, my girlfriend has just peed on my cheap material made sofa. I rose up from my seat and shouted, "What the hell woman, why on earth are you peeing on my seat. If you cant get to the loo fast enough why don't you carry a bottle or a bucket or something and strap it on your waist, Damn!!"
She must have gotten angry at my yelling coz she dashes towards either the bedroom or the loo, i don't know i wasn't sure. I was left there fuming and furious. Of all things to punish a guy with, why the hell does she gotta pee all over my living room and on my seat. And fyoof, the smell from that pee jeez, all the cockroaches hiding under the sofa must have suffocated immediately. Only men are allowed to pee anywhere, at least we have 'good aiming ability'! Considering i had just replaced the cushions of that particular sofa, twice, because now she weighs like a Toyota Vitz and looks like two people stapled together and she had worn out my cheap cushions.
As i was standing there being overwhelmed by the pee stench which was making me think whether my girlfriend used to drink Diesel for breakfast or the baby farts Co19 and pees Engine Oil, My girlfriend shows up breathing heavily and holding two bags....."My water just broke, we gotta go now, now now LETS GO!!"
My girlfriend had thrown her arm across and almost hit a place where all men would die protecting. Her hand was tightly squeezing as her fingernails dug inside my thighs and i almost screamed but when i looked at my girlfriend, the expression on her face was that of a person with serious constipation issues. Then amidst all this pain, she peed. Can you believe that, my girlfriend has just peed on my cheap material made sofa. I rose up from my seat and shouted, "What the hell woman, why on earth are you peeing on my seat. If you cant get to the loo fast enough why don't you carry a bottle or a bucket or something and strap it on your waist, Damn!!"
She must have gotten angry at my yelling coz she dashes towards either the bedroom or the loo, i don't know i wasn't sure. I was left there fuming and furious. Of all things to punish a guy with, why the hell does she gotta pee all over my living room and on my seat. And fyoof, the smell from that pee jeez, all the cockroaches hiding under the sofa must have suffocated immediately. Only men are allowed to pee anywhere, at least we have 'good aiming ability'! Considering i had just replaced the cushions of that particular sofa, twice, because now she weighs like a Toyota Vitz and looks like two people stapled together and she had worn out my cheap cushions.
As i was standing there being overwhelmed by the pee stench which was making me think whether my girlfriend used to drink Diesel for breakfast or the baby farts Co19 and pees Engine Oil, My girlfriend shows up breathing heavily and holding two bags....."My water just broke, we gotta go now, now now LETS GO!!"
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